It's New Year's Eve and as we are approaching 2009 it's a time to take stock and, I have to be honest here, I'm not particularly chuffed with how Alien Spouse has been over the last few months.
What happened was that I mentioned that I blog to someone I didn't know particularly well, and I sent her a link. She then proceeded to tell a bunch of other people. Who I work with.
Actually she told them before I even got the job. She suggested they read my blog when they were, in fact, preparing to interview me because my blog is just "so funny!"; I only found this out after I got the job, when they all assured me they hadn't read it. When one of them first mentioned it to me I honestly felt my heart stop for a moment as my mind raced to think of anything that I might not want them to have read and I did go back and edit some of my archives.
Now it's always been a rule of mine that I don't blog about work directly anyway, but somehow knowing that your Departmental Director might just be bored one day and decide to check out what you've been blogging about recently really makes me think twice about sharing my thoughts on some subjects. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't do that, but I can't know for certain, particularly as I must admit that if I knew one of my colleagues had a blog you can bet your bootstraps I would read it. And please don't think for a moment that this is because I don't like any of the people in my office, they honestly do all rock! But since knowing they are aware of Alien Spouse I have felt slightly uncomfortable, purely because I don't really know them very well yet, and I would have preferred to be the one who told them about my blog if I wanted to. I suppose it's mainly that I am wary of offending anyone inadvertently, because I make a joke on my blog that they don't find funny, or that I'm having a bad day and rant about something that I don't think is in any connected to them, but, because this is a very small town, it turns out I'm actually saying something rude about their cousin.
Of course I know full well that this isn't controversial blog by any stretch of the imagination, it's written mainly for my mother's entertainment after all, but I certainly never meant for it to be primarily about my cats! I was envisioning the odd cameo when they did something particularly cute, but lately they have taken over and I don't want to write a crazy cat lady blog (Although Nancy actually just play fought with me! It's a breakthrough! She even rabbit kicked!).
I'm not sure what to do about this situation, hence this slightly passive-aggressive post on the subject. I haven't told anyone at work that I would feel uncomfortable knowing they read this, because that would probably be the quickest way to raise their curiosity about it, but I've kept an eye on my stats and there don't seem to be any new local readers lurking so I'm assuming they've simply forgotten all about it.
It's funny how over time the sense of anonymity has become something I
really wish I had protected more. At first it seemed restrictive, but now
that a large chunk of it has just been removed without my being able to do a
thing about it, I realise how liberating it really was to have the opportunity to say pretty much anything I wanted. It's most frustrating. So much so that I have created a secret side project blog where I go off to scream rude words occasionally. And, no, I'm not telling anyone where it is.
I may have said too much already.
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