Alien Spouse

Four Pairs of Jeans - Breaking My Previous Personal Best!

Almost exactly two years ago, give or take a fortnight, I posted this picture:

This is a photograph of may wearing three pairs of jeans at once, because I had gone down so many sizes that it was now possible for me to layer denim over my hips and still get all of the buttons done up - Oh, and breath still!

I felt it was time to attempt a new personal best record, and can now truthfully say that I can wear four pairs of jeans at once. Should I ever be asked that.

The second pair of jeans in the more recent picture is the foundation pair of jeans glimpsed in the earlier photo. I don't remember if any of the other jeans were involved in both experiments.

There is no photo manipulation techniques employed, and I wasn't wearing any type of corset. I will admit to being very careful with my posture though, because my tummy still does have some fat on it and that fat will try to spill over the top of jeans if I slouch. The easiest fix for this is not to slouch.

And, of course, this is my new Facebook profile picture, I enjoy peer approval as much as the next girl.

Saturday Shopping - Jeans and Soft Furnishings.

After breakfast (see previous post for details) we fed our friends' cats, which is always nice because they are so very pleased to see someone after a night alone - My Converse got a particular thorough loving from Molly Cat, but they are still cats so as soon as we had fulfilled our function and filled their food bowls we were ignored.

Doc C and I then went shopping, and I confirmed my suspicion that I have indeed gone down an entire size of jeans. This naturally called for trying on jeans in Levi's (even though I can't wear Levi's because my hips untuck the pockets somehow), Gap, J. Crew, Banana Republic and Old Navy. I bought very skinny (and very cheap - $10!) black jeans and wide legged blue jeans. Score.

We also needed stuff for the house, we bought a classic bamboo steamer, a huge stock pot and some nice firm cushions for the sofa.

Doc C and I compromised on these - He chose the floral (Ralph Lauren...) and I wanted the two London monuments (No name designer...). I'm usually skeptical about overtly British design elements, but these stark graphicsare so very fun and they look great; even more importantly they are really comfortable too. 

Cake for Breakfast.

We decided last night we were going to go out for breakfast this morning, and I looked up our favourite breakfast place's menu on-line to ponder my options. I decided on a vegetable packed tempeh scramble, and was fully intending to eat that - right up until I saw the specials board and read the words "Pound Cake French Toast - with raspberry cooli and warm frsh peach sauce". I mean how are you supposed to turn your nose up at that?

 I, for one, have no idea, it was a really delicious french toast concept. Bravo!

Maude in Progress.

I don't generally post pictures of works in progress on-line, but I offered to make a pair of "Harold and Maude" (1971) amigurumis for Megg back in freaking NOVEMBER, so, you know, I thought I'd make an exception. 

This is Maude, I actually made her head when I was in England, so she's been percolating for a while now, and, after seriously months of internal debate, I finally decided to dress her in the outfit she wears to the second (I think?) funeral; so a classic trench coat with a pink silk scarf (not made yet) and a big yellow umbrella.

I still haven't quite decided how to dress Harold, should he wear the clothes he is in for the second funeral, or should I go for one of his more colourful and therefore fun outfits? He has a particularly great pinkish tweed suit that keeps jumping up and down in my mind, but I have no earthly clue how I would do that. Maybe baker's twine? I don't know. Fortunately I do know for definite that Harold will have very long legs, and they will definitely be clad in flares.

Door-to-Door Letter Opener.

I love this! It's another gem from the retiring professor's office, and it's a plastic letter opener with a molded decoration on both sides of the handle. One side is a travelling saleswoman and the other is a travelling salesman, and just underneath both is the logo for Fuller's Brush Co. I adore the "Mad Men" vibe on this, but I especially love the travelling saleswoman and her fabulous outfit. I want that dress, and those gloves. Gorgeous.

Naturally I did a little google research, and I discovered that these letter openers were promotional freebies from Fuller's, which is just delightful. These letter openers aren't terribly collectible and they are easy to buy cheaply on ebay, so I'm thinking I might turn it into a piece of jewellery somehow. I think it's too big for a necklace, but maybe a brooch or a bracelet.

A Bouquet of Pipecleaners.

One of our longest serving faculty is retiring, so he is clearing out his office and gifting the treasures he finds to his friends and colleagues.

Yesterday I was given this bunch of pipecleaners, which I'm sure have a future as skelatal structures of amigurumi, but for now are impersonating impressionistic flowers on my desk.

I also got several different types of card index, a beer mat and an elephant trunk mask; whilst Doc has scored a giant pair of chalk compasses for drawing accurate circles on blackboard. 

Book Pile-Up.

I love books, but I especially love second-hand books. When I discovered Goodreads I was immediately smitten by the swap feature, which allows users to list books they no longer want and then other readers can pay the shipping and get the book.

It does still cost $3 or $4 in postage fees, so I try to limit how many books I request, but occasionally a glut of titles that I want happen to be listed in close proximity. This is how I ended up receiving Donna Tartt's "The Secret History", Sarah Waters' "The Little Stranger" and Tim Gunn's "A Guide to Quality, Taste and Style" in the post this morning, whilst I'm still only about half-way through "The Lottery" by Shirley Jackson.

Books! FOR ME!

Kivik - The Big Red Sofa.

This is is the new sofa in all it's red glory. It only occured to me today that the "God Save the Queen" cushion would look rocking on this.

Inter-Species Communication Break-Down.

Yesterday I cleaned the downstairs bathroom floor with a swiffer wet cloth, which did a perfectly reasonable job from my human perspective, but apparently did not stand up to the exacting standards of Edith Cavell-Cat.

Clearly I need to get out the mop and re-do it, properly this time (Pre-Wash: vinegar and lemon. Wash: Dr Bonner's soap in Eucalyptus. Rinse: water) , or she'll pee on the lino again.

I do wish cats could learn to write passive-aggressive notes instead of protesting quite so dirtily.

The Lodger (1927) - A Note with Pictures!

Having done a photo essay on the the 1944 version of "The Lodger" I really wanted to re-visit Hitchcock's 1927 film of the same name to make comparisons. The problem was that I got a little bit carried away and ended up grabbing something like 300 screen shots, that is a lot of pictures of people wearing dubious make-up and gesticulating wildly. I became somewhat overwhelmed by my material at this point.

However, having watched "The Lodger" (1927) in close proximity to "Wizard of Gore" (2007 - It was pretty much as you'd expect from the title, but with not enough of the Wizard himself in my opinion), I have an important note which I wish to make, so that I can take credit for this genius should it ever come to pass - If a film requires the role of Ivor Novello to be cast then Crispin Glover would be perfect.

Seriously! Crispin, you need to be snapping up those story rights to Novello's biography pronto and working on the accent!

 

Boo-Boo Kitty.

After getting moles removed last week I've had to apply a cream to them twice a day and cover them all with plasters because they are taking ages to heal and still sort of look like cigarette burns. Which is just lovely.

I decided to get some Hello Kitty plasters for the odd thing (it wasn't ever a mole, I think it was a cat scratch that just never seemed to heal properly) on my chest. This needed prettifying because, as it's just above the neckline on most of my t-shirts, it's also the only removal site that can actually be seen when I'm fully dressed. 

Today the dermatologist's office called and it turns out that the weird chest thing was in fact "the wimpiest form of skin cancer", which is I believe a medical term. I'll have to go back in a couple of weeks and have further treatment, which actually sounds like nothing more than a really thorough exfoliation. Not too big a deal.

However the mole that was on my left breast was displastic, which isn't a huge deal but it's still better to make sure they get all of it (the one on my back was also displastic, but they got all of that one last time). So whilst I'm in for exfoliation, they'll also need to take a bigger section of that one, which will then require stitches.

The nurse who was scheduling my appointment asked if I was likely to feel anxious, and if so would I like a valium to take an hour before the appointment?

Oh, go on then. And I'm bloody well taking the day off work as well.

Zonked Out.

...hmph...what?.. Asleep? On the sofa? Since I got home five hours ago?

Well, yes.

It was a combination of the new sofa's memory foam comfortableness, the pint of Guinness I had after work and it being a very warm day.

Chaotic Cacophany.

When I woke up this morning I had a headache, but I got ready for work and dragged myself to campus (well, Doc C drove me most of the way really).

When I arrived my heart sank because outside the front door to my building were a number of huge and serious-looking machines, one of which was clearly a wood chipper. My actual office is about ten feet away from the main entrance, so it sounded like trees were being chainsawed and then chipped just over my right shoulder. It did smell lovely, so that was something.

Over the summer there is a new dorm building going up, so I have had a building site right outside the window for a couple of months now. I swear that they have been stepping things up so that the site not only has the usual mixers, forklifts, trucks, beeping reversing alerts, cranes, sledgehammers,power-saws, power-sanders and workmen with preternaturally loud voices, but also what sounds like a bass drum, a lonely wolf and a small rave from 1993. This is directly behind me.

But that's not all - My building is also playing host to the summer school for a local middle school, and so there are young teenagers screeching through the hallways every hour or so. It's odd to hear "GIRL POWER!" being bellowed by what is quite clearly an adolescent male but teenage boys away from the nurturing influence of their parental units are very loud; they also smell, especially when they get caught in the rain. Ooh, as a special treat for today the kids have been getting into the lift in large groups and then jumping in unison, so I can hear the high pitched whine of the lift-doors opening and closing in distress.

Essentially I've been sitting in a surround sound hell for my entire working day, and I already had a headache before any of that started. Is it really any wonder that when people ask me how my summer is going I'm just growling at them?

A Lounge in Scarlet.

Following our trip to Ikea on Friday, we are awaiting delivery of our new Kivik sofa.

Our new RED Kivik sofa.

Somehow we have managed to furnish our living room almost entirely in red; which obviously must have been intentional on some level because, well, we bought it and we discussed each purchase very deliberately (It took us SO long to decide on a sofa - I still feel like I'm in Ikea discussing the Klippan in ridiculous detail, looking at fabric samples and trying to find a Sater but not being able to remember it's name. sigh). Still, all this vermillion feels like this snuck up on us somehow.

The good news is that the sofa is from Ikea, so there are covers available in different colours if we realise we have overwhelmed our home with crimson.

 

Charlotte - Wheels, Sofas and Make-Up.

Today the little car was booked in to the Mini dealership in Charlotte to get new wheels, so I took the day off to drive down with Doc C. I'm not mad keen on Charlotte, but spending the day with Doc is always fun.

The trip has will include a few other things, such as a return to Ikea to re-try the sofas, because we forgot which one we thought was actually the most comfortable last time. Doc became overwhelmed by the Ikea experience on his first visit and flaked out half-way round, so I really hope he's better prepared mentally this time and has brought pain killers and protein bars.

I will also be testing his endurance by looking at make-up in Sephora, because I need some way of keeping my mascara from giving me panda-eyes.

Groundhog!

Sometimes I won't see any wild animals for ages, apart from the really sleepy ones having a nap by the side if the road, but Monday featured our very own Groundhog Day in which we saw two whilst driving between my dermatologist's office and the chemists. The first one was quite a fleeting glimpse, but the second was a much less flighty rodent.

This groundhog happened to be right next to the traffic lights eating grass and being blithly uninterested in the cars, but when some motorcycles roared past he looked up to see what all the kerfuffle was about.

I like to think, based on his facial expression here, he was telling those hoodlums to keep off his lawn.

New Shoes - Capezio Fierce Dansneakers.

I decided to rest last week after having climbed things, walked places and danced extensively, but then after having my moles removed on Monday I didn't really want to do anything too strenuous so the rest period was inadvertently extended. Fortunately this inertia coincided with my having ordered dance trainers (American Translation - Sneakers) from Amazon and waiting for them to be delivered; yesterday, just as I was thinking I really really wanted to jump about a bit, I was further motivated by New Shoes arriving! Exciting! Admittedly the shoes themselves aren't visually thrilling, I got the sensibly priced but amusingly named Capezio Fierce Dansneaker (I really wanted these, but they are apparently about half a size off in their sizing and these don't go up to a 10 1/2), but they make SO much difference to my dancing.

The thing is that if you wear normal trainers or running shoes for dancing on a carpeted floor, which is what I was doing for my Zumba routines, then you can't slide your feet very well. This means you can't spin or do some of the quicker footwork precisely, and there is a possibility that you might torque your knee, which I am given to understand would be bad. Also these trainers have a "Flat, boxed toe for toe stands" and a "Split sole design for flexibility and foot articulation", so they feel considerably more dancer-y then my gym trainers did.

Obviously my skill level hasn't improved because of the addition of New Shoes, but they do have a less grippy sole to them, so it is now possible for me to do a spin without having to partially hop my way round.

Funny Looking Thing.

On Saturday we went to Asheville to get my haircut and to eat sushi; when I got into the car this weird looking insect was clinging to my window. It stayed there for about a mile before finally getting blown away.

It has really lovely wings, but those long antenna-type whatsits on it's bottom are distressing.

Too Damn Hot (Well, It's the Humidity Really).

It is far too warm for me to do anything at the moment apart from watch television and compose an internal complaint monologue about how humid it is. This does not make for interesting blogging (unless you want re-caps of SyFy shows), but it does keep me from eating my own body weight in ice cream.

Tall Trees.

Gorgeous leafy green shade. Want.

Water Features.

Why? Why would anybody want to purchase fountains that looked like various creatures continuously spitting? I am at a loss.

If absolutely forced to chose one, for some totally bizarre hypothetical reason, I would probably go with the gnome.

Mole Drive-By.

I had an appointment booked to have my moles checked at the dermatologists at 7:40 this morning, which was clearly ridiculous, but all the more so when I woke up with a headache. I dragged myself out of bed to get ready and we actually got there on time, but I warned Doc that I'd probably just want to go home afterwards.

I'm used to doctor's looking at my moles, and usually they really aren't that interested in them. I've had a few removed before, but only when I have really insisted on it because the moles were annoying in some way. Well, that's at home in England; here in the US they whip moles off you as soon as look at them. I mean the doctor wasn't particularly worried about any of the moles as far as I could tell, but thought they may as well be tested, so I had four taken off this morning, and I hadn't expected that at all! I don't think the moles were expecting it either! I definitely wanted to come home after that, because one mole had been right underneath the elasticated waistband of the skirt I was wearing, and two other were exactly below my bra straps. I just wanted to come home and feel sorry for myself in a nice loose fitting nighty.

So that's what I did.

The Lodger (1944) - Pictures with Notes!

There were two main reasons for watching "The Lodger" (1944), first of all I watched the Hitchcock silent version a couple of weeks ago so I wanted to compare them, and secondly the police inspector in this version was played by George Sanders and I adore George Sanders.

I took screenshots of my favourite scenes - Sometimes because they were utterly ridiculous, but sometimes because they were really quite impressively atmospheric.

I'll continue after the jump because, whilst I think this is extremely entertaining, I do understand that not everyone wants to look at random still images from a film they probably haven't seen. 

Please note that after the jump will be spoilers, but as there is absolutely no plot twist of any kind in the film I don't feel revealing the lack of them would actually spoil anyone's viewing experience. The thing with films made in the forties is that they were barely allowed to sneeze without the censors taking offence, so a plot that deals with the Jack the Ripper case becomes, well, a bit silly in places really and if the plot itself isn't being then the heroine is just wilfully good hearted and ludicrously trusting. There is being nice, and then there is just being bloody stupid.

Guinness O'Clock.

Yesterday I was really grumpy, so I made a cup of tea and went to bed early with a B&W film. I think I was mainly sad about Lucille,my friend David's dog, who died at the weekend. David is currently in London with a group of students, so I haven't been able to give him a hug or hand him a strong drink. It's just so sad, Lucy was a really sweet dog and I'll miss her.

The other theory is that I psychically intuited how irritating people were going to be today (Good Grief People! What do you want from me? Argh!), and that I would be very glad that Doc C had a meeting in the pub after work. Which is where I am now with a pint of Guinness. It does a soul good.

 

cough *Charter* cough

Please allow me to vent for a moment about the deplorable lack of internet this holiday weekend. Essentially our wifi router is the same one we've had since we moved to North Carolina in 2007 - so it's at least four years old, and it's been fine for pretty much all of that time.

Right up until Friday evening actually, when our internet access started to become erratic and it just got worse through out Saturday. According to the tech that Doc spoke to on Sunday our wifi router model was black-listed, which meant that it couldn't cope with the higher speed internet that was now available.

My question is this; clearly something actually happened on Friday to speed things up. Why do that on the Friday before a long weekend? And, if there is a really really good reason to do it on that particular day, might it not be polite to contact those cutomers who might be effected by this so they can make alternative arrangements in advance? Hmmm?

Action Day!

With the internet being down all weekend, you have missed out on my blogging about some truly epic napping, but after a very restful couple of days I did actually do something on Monday. It being the 4th of July I had the day off, and I woke up with the urge to do something new and exciting, like go to the climbing tower in town, and climb to the top of it.

So I did.

I did quite well on the sloped wall, and scrambled up the green route (on the left) and the blue route (that I'm at the top of on the right!), but the straight wall was a lot more challenging.

I got quite close to the top of the straight wall when a grasshopper-type insect jumped out of the hand-hold I was reaching for and landed on my face. I had no idea that a jumping insect without wings could get so high, so frankly it freaked me out a bit and I decided to come down. Well, it was a combination of the insect, not being able to work where next to put my hands or feet, and this being my third climb of the day which meant my arms were getting tired; all of which which left me feeling suddenly not very confident up there. So I came down before I got too over-whelmed, but I fully intend to go back and get to the top next time!

After that I suggested to Doc C that we go for a nice gentle hike around our favourite local lake, and that was very pleasant too.

All in all it was an action packed day, and that was well before the major thunderstorm or any of the various fireworks displays.