Alien Spouse

The Amazing Edith Cavell-Cat Will Walk The High Wire (Shelf)!

Doc bought a set of shelves today, which he has put in the living room in front of the windows so that his plants can get enough light.  The obvious problem with this plan is grey, fluffy and really really nosey.  This is why he chose shelves made of metal rods, because he was pretty sure that cats would not like walking on it.

Doc theorised that once the cats discovered for themselves that walking on the shelves wasn't any fun, that they wouldn't do it again.  However we didn't want to just put the cats on the shelves, because they would just jump straight off again out of principle; so we started to try and entice Edith.  She will do anything to vanquish her sworn enemy; the dread crinkly ball of coloured foil!

Edith walked across the shelf very slowly and carefully to get to the ball, but she clearly decided it wasn't worth it and slowly got back down again.  Lesson learnt we hope, although I did still see her eyeing up the higher shelves later on.  Edith is no rocket surgeon.

Nancy?  Nancy curled up and made a nest on my hoody, but that's ok; she can't jump that high anyway.

The sTori of Tori.

Ooh!  This morning I finished reading  "sTori Telling" by Tori Spelling and I now may, or may not, want to read her second book "Mommywood".  Don't judge me!  I know it seems really shallow to find celeb autobiographies fascinating, but her life has just been so bizarrely different to mine and it's always interesting to read which anecdotes a fellow human tells in an attempt to explain themselves.  I think because it was like reading the archives of her blog, and I realised that I would subscribe to that RSS feed in a heart beat. 

Wait, let me google "Tori Spelling, blog".............

I can't believe she doesn't have a proper blog! She's only got a myspace page, damn it.  I hate myspace. grumble...grumble...grumble...

Wait!  She Twitters!  I knew that Twitter would appeal to such a compulsive texter! I am all over it!  Those up to the second Tori and Dean updates are mine!

I SAID DON'T JUDGE ME, DAMN IT!

Zoom!

Today felt really long, but I can't believe it's Wednesday already or that Friday will be the first of May!

I seem to remember someone telling me when I was a kid that time feels as though it speeds up as you get older. Maybe that's all it is.

Anyway, I've totally failed to get a photo today, and I'm too tired to find a good subject right now. I'll find you something extra good tomorrow!

Craft Sale in Aid of Technology.

Today the technology department had a craft fair, and I really don't know if that is supposed ironic or not.  I browsed for a while, but it was all a bit arts-and-crafts for me really.  In the end I bought a pair of garnet stud earrings and a small pottery vase.  I bought the vase for Doc C because it has a wide mouth but a narrow neck, which means he can use it as a cup for his bedside water at night. 

This may sound bizarre, but it is necessary because otherwise Edith will jump up onto the table to drink his water and this really annoys the Doc (it probably doesn't help that I think it's quite funny, does it?).  I'm fairly certain that she won't be able to fit her head into the vase, so this might solve the problem, but knowing Edith she will just dip her paw in or tip it over instead.  She is an evil genius, with a wicked sense of humour.

Alarmingly Routine.

Doc and I have very different approaches to waking up during the week. 

• My alarm clock goes off first, and that starts with the charming sound of birdsong, followed by a witty morning greeting from Stephen Fry, before the beeping part of the alarm goes off.  I then doze for fifteen minutes, before my iPod chimes in with a lovely harp playing scales at which point I get up (or I check my e-mail and web comics).  I find this combination of sounds wakes me up gently but reliably and I quite often start the day with a smile.
• Doc's phone has a horrible klaxon sound, which is the sound he has chosen to jolt him awake.  He then hits snooze and it goes off again five minutes later.  I'm already downstairs eating breakfast by this point, but I'm pretty sure he then swears and hits snooze again.  Sometimes he'll also then have the phone's marimba ring tone go off, which is much more fun but still really loud and abrupt.  Doc hates waking up, and so he finds this barrage of loud obnoxious sounds to be the most effective means of forcing himself to face the day.

Very different approaches.

We do agree on a couple of points, however, for example that we do not wake up before 6 on a work day.  That's just wrong and unnecessary when you only live ten minutes away from the office.  Another thing we concur on is that having a ten pound weight dropped onto our tummies is a particularly unpleasant way to greet the day.

I just wish we could explain these two vital points to Edith.

Last night we had to leave the bedroom door open because it was too warm in our room, and we needed to get the air circulating.  Nancy immediately came upstairs, found a comfy place on the floor, tucked her paws under herself and proceeded to face-plant quietly.  Edith?  Nothing is ever that easy with Edith.  She started off sitting on my bedside table, watching me closely whilst blithely shoving things on to the floor.  If I moved and/or brought a hand out from under the covers, Edith would purr loudly and fawn all over me.  If I didn't move for any period of time, she would check me for a pulse.  Well, it was actually the cat equivalent, which involved pawing at me until I woke up and fussed her.  This began to bore her after an hour or two, so she ran downstairs for a while and tore around like a mad thing, before racing back up to our room and mewing plaintively.  We discovered in the morning that she had brought up one of her tinsel balls and put it into Doc's shoe, that must have been what she was trying to tell us.

At around four she launched her main assault, which was her classic technique of cantering back and forth across the bed at stomach level; until I got out of bed, scooped her up and ushered her gently out of the room. Doc and I were both shattered today, but I think the worst part was that we had known that is what she was going to do before we even tried to sleep.  And she'll probably do it again tonight. 

Stupid cat.

Let's Start Today Off With A Smile!

Tightly packed bubbles molded into a giant floating smiley, and drifting slowly up into a clear blue sky.

It's just a really nice video (which I found via the reliably great Quiddity. Thanks Megg!).

Dance Amigurumi Dance!

This is the cigar box I bought on Saturday, doesn't it make a perfect theatre for Amigurumi?  I think that's what it will probably end up being, because it is exactly the right size for it.

In other news, I am a very bad friend and have still not sent Ferret his Victoria Page.  I think it's because I'm not a hundred percent happy with the hair, but I'm not sure what to do about that.  In this scene in the film Miss Page has her hair in one of those odd looking side up-do's from the late forties; the sort I suspect you can only get away with them if you have post-war facial features and my Amigurumi just doesn't.

Anyway, I keep thinking inspiration will strike and I'll work out a way to make her appropriately beautiful.  We shall see.

In the mean time she is very much enjoying being the prima ballerina in the ballet recital currently at the Partagas Theatre (just off Shaftsbury Ave., at the Piccadilly Circus end).

Stinky-Cheese Man

That's better!  Cats can solve any problem!

Well, except for the mysterious aroma of pungent cheese, that is pervading the house this evening.  It's one of those annoying vague smells that you can't sniff out the source of, but it'll just tap you on the nose when you least expect it to.

Our first guess was actually stinky stinky felines, which, if true, would have solved it, but this has not proved to be the case; so now we are sort of stumped.  Our two latest theories are that we've inadvertently misplaced half a block of Gorgonzola down the back of the sofa, or the golf club is trying out a new dairy based hazard for Xtreme Golfers.

I'm rather glad that Doc can smell it too, because I thought for a while it was just me.  Wouldn't it be awful to suffer from blue cheese olfactory hallucinations or to be haunted by a malevolent phantom Stilton?  You would be bound to become horribly paranoid, I think.  Fortunately for me though, Doc C can smell it and he has a weak sense of smell so it must be real.  I just wish I could find where it was coming from.

A Sad Monday.

Today was particularly Monday, in many many ways. 

One of which is just really tragic, and frankly it was nothing at all to do with me.  I feel I shouldn't discuss it further here, because it's definitely work related for one thing, but mainly because it was very very sad.

I'm going to go and play with the cats for a bit.

Kirsty MacColl.

Before this evening Doc C had only ever heard the Billy Bragg version of "New England", and was totally unaware of "There's A Guy Works Done the Chip Shop Swears He's Elvis".

This has now been rectified.

Cat Mini Spa Day.

Today is mini-spa day in the Alien Spouse house!

By which I mean that I plastered on a moisturising hair mask (Marilyn from Lush, my hair responds very well to a weekly treatment I find) when I got up, so it'll have a nice long soaking in period.

Then we had breakfast (Crumpets! Yum!) and I suddenly decided it was time to bath the cats, because their fur still has an undercoat, and it's starting to get hot so we need to get that off them before we get into the shedding-furballs-puking cycle that all cat owners know so very very well; plus they both smell like cat food and frankly that's not delightful to my nose.  Doc has been talking about actually putting the cats in a bath with water, and personally I would love to watch him try that but I'll have no part of it because I think it would end badly all round.  There would be a lot of indignation and hurt feelings in both the feline and human camps, and I'm fairly certain everyone would say things they didn't really mean. 

Instead I got out the bottle of dry shampoo we'd got free with the Furminator.  Now it's called dry shampoo, but it's actually a liquid that you spray onto the cat, rub in and then allow to dry before brushing it out along with the loose fur and dirt.

Can you see any design flaws there?

That's right!  You try spraying your cat with a liquid and see how far you get.  They hate it.  I quickly worked out the only way to get this done was to spray some into my hand and then rub it into the fur.  That they will tolerate, although with no good grace.

Then you have to brush the stuff out.  Both of our cats don't mind the first stroke or two of a brush, but then they get annoyed with it.  Nancy believes you are trying to kill her with kindness, and Edith just tries  to kill you.  Note to self:  Miss Edith Cavell-Cat requires both a manicure and a pedicure before her wash-and-set, and she does not suffer mistakes gladly.

 

(Doc glanced over at one point to see what all Edith's fuss was about and said "Baby! You've got a really nasty scratch on your arm!" I was all  "Yes, Love, I do know.  Thanks.")

Still both cats look a lot better now, very sleek and shiny, plus they smell like they've just come back from the hairdressers with that expensive fruity coconut shampoo smell.  So to re-cap I am bloodied and neither cat will come anywhere near me, but I think it was worth it.  Just look at the size of the hairballs I've pre-empted!

A Most Varied Saturday.

 This morning when I came down to feed the cats I immediately noticed that the cat tower had been knocked over, because I am perceptive like that.  What I don't understand is how the thing fell on it's side without waking me or The Doc up.  I mean it's pretty big, wouldn't it have made some noise?

Anyway, then Doc made me crumpets for breakfast.  This time I had jam on mine.  It was nice.

Then we went food shopping and on the way we stopped off at the pet shop.  We wanted a food container, but they had none in stock.  However they did have cat harnesses and leads.  More of that later...

On the way to the supermarket we were walking passed a small bookshop and I spotted Tori Spelling's autobiography "Stori Telling" on the sale table.  It is now mine.  It turned out that it was actually a bookshop, newsagents and cigar shop.  We browsed the magazines, and Doc asked me who the little old lady sitting outside was doing out there; on the way in I'd seen that she had a stack of books and a sign saying she was doing a signing.  Doc went back outside to chat with her, whilst I was asking about the empty cigar boxes they had on top of the shelves.  It turned out they were all for sale, and I have found a fantastic square box with a open front to it for $3.  I have no idea what I'll do with it, but it just looks really useful for something.  When I went back out, Doc had decided to buy two books from the author outside, she was a Russian emigre who had moved to the US when she was 8.  Her first book was about that experience, and the second book was a collection of the letters she and her husband wrote to each other before they married.  Doc asked her to sign the second book and bought it for me; she also gave him a copy of her husband's poetry, I think just because he was interested in it.

After doing the food shopping we came home, and put the harness on the cats one at a time.  They had no idea what the hell was going on, and as you can see Nancy looked particularly comfortable in it.  Poor Nance liked the going outside part, but hated the harness, so she kept walking backwards to try and get out of it.  Edith mainly just rolled around on the front path.

Then I came back in for my movie marathon.  "I Married A Monster from Outer Space" was fun, Doc went so far as to say it was "Rocking", mainly because of the surprisingly good special effects and some good solid performances.  As planned I then watched "Cheaper by the Dozen" which Doc wasn't interested in, so he cooked and just caught the odd scene.  Straight after that on TCM was "Funny Girl" OMG!  Doc lasted about 15 minutes before declaring he had enough.  I can't think why.  I mean I'm not a huge Barbra fan, but her early movie career was pretty good, so I watched the start and end around the "Ashes to Ashes" finale.  It was a very good evening for film and TV.

Oh, That picture in the bottom left hand corner?  That would be Edith killing her crinkly shiny ball toy, because I think it's hilarious when she does that.  She takes it so seriously!

Crocheted Rorschach Progressing Nicely.

I am progressing with Rorschach, so far I've made the head and half of the body; which are the easy parts!  I have a pattern for a crocheted top hat, so I think I'll use that and then squash in the middle.  That will work perfectly, I'm sure. 

Yep. 

I'm totally positive that will look like a fedora, not a squashed beige topper.

Very very confident about that.

Rain on a Sunny Day.

Today has been a warm sunny day with a bright blue sky, but towards the end of the day storm clouds started to gather.  It was really odd, because the sky directly above our house was blue but I could see lightening and hear thunder.

I tried to get a panoramic shot of this, but I had to tinker a bit with it in Picnik; so that the light and colours really approximated how it looked to me.

The Knitted Village.

This is very impressive, a miniature replica of a village knitted by people who live there.  The BBC has photos here, the report says that it took 40 people 23 years to complete

The only thing that worries me is the amount of space it must take up, because it's hard to tell from the pictures and they don't give a precise square footage.  Apparently this is going to be sold off in individual pieces to raise money for charity, but I bet not all of it will be sold or they just start making another one.

This is precisely why I make sure I know where my amigurumis are going before I start them, otherwise I'll get over attached to them and my entire house would end up waist deep in chubby little figures made from yarn.  Although the cats would love that I'm sure.

Speaking of amigurumis, I am gearing up to make Rorschach from "The Watchmen" this weekend, I bought the right colours of cotton yarn when we were in Philladelphia but I've been putting it off because I have no idea how I am going to do the face, or the hat and those are the main distinguishing features.  Anyway, I'll sketch it out tonight, and just start the thing tomorrow.

After that I'm going to make something for my cousin Hollie (She initially asked for the green monster, which I think means Cthulu, but I'm thinking we may need to discuss this a bit before I start), but then there will be a new contest.  So it won't be for a few weeks, but I want to give you some advance notice because this is going to be a bit more complicated than the first one, and it's much more about you guys! 

Here's the basic idea,

1. You suggest characters that you would like to see crocheted amigurumis of. 
2. I will then pick a shortlist (Let's all assume that I get more than one entry for this! Hopefully!), and do an initial sketch how I think I would make them.
3. I will post those basic designs, and you can vote on which character I make. 
4. The winner will be the person who originated the idea, and they will get the amigurumi, so make sure you suggest things that you actually want!  

It can be a fictional character or real person (Like Niall's Zombie Queen Mother), or something you've totally made up, but can describe clearly (Ella's guess of a vampire librarian bunny would be a great example, I know exactly how I would do that!).  Anything you want to see crocheted, I will try and work out how to make.  So consider the idea, and be ready for phase one soon!

Don't submit any entries yet.

I'm just mentioning it now, so you can think about it for a bit.

The Heart of Glass Hotel and Restaurant.

I had a dream last night that I was in a big city (a cross between New York & London) and staying in a fantastic hotel run by Deborah Harry. I was quite disappointed when I woke up to realise that such a hostelry does not, in reality, exist.

Because it was the best hotel ever ever ever!

Nancy Thinks - "I Shall Kill It!"

I was trying to get a photo of Edith doing one of her spectacular leaps to catch a ball, although for the first time ever she was uncharacteristically camera shy.  So with Doc's help I tried filming it, and I did get her mid-leap, but I was too close really and you couldn't really appreciate the height.

Anyway, then Nancy started playing with the feather duster thingy, and I began filming her instead.  Both cats find the combination of the duster and the foot-stool absolutely fascinating, so Edith joined in and I got the whole thing on video.

It's only about two minutes long, and I've added a soundtrack so you don't have to listen to me and Doc giggling.  I really like how Nancy is getting a teeny tiny bit feistier, but Edith is always going to be the bigger cat.

I Shall Kill It! from Jen Alien-Spouse on Vimeo.

Administrative? Kinda. Professional? Ummm... Sure!

As you probably know this is Administrative Professional's Week...  Yeah, I had no idea either; until today when I was given a card and a present at the weekly departmental meeting.

The gift was a laminated mini poster for "I Married a Monster from Outer Space"!   It's scary how well do these people know me, isn't it?  The film is an alien body-snatcher-esque B-movie from 1958, which looks really fun.  So yes, of course, I immediately added "I Married a Monster from Outer Space" to our Netflix queue, but it actually is scheduled to be screened on TCM on Saturday afternoon.  How weird is that?

My plans for Saturday are simple, whilst Doc is writing or grading or something, I intend to make popcorn, snuggle up with the cats under a blanket on the sofa and watch what promises to be schlocky fun.  Clearly that sounds like a fun afternoon by itself, but immediately after "I Married a Monster from Outer Space" TCM will be showing the 1950 Myrna Loy and Clifton Webb sentimental classic "Cheaper by the Dozen".

Hoorah!  Movie marathon at my house!

The Red Shoes.

My new Doctor Marten peep-toe shoes arrived today!

Aren't they lovely?  Such a great shade of red, and I really like the pattern on the innersole.  It actually snowed a little tiny bit today, but I still wore these all day around the office.

These shoes make me very happy, because they prove it is possible to have all the comfort and support of a nice chunky DM sole, with a lovely girly upper.  Win-Win!  These will look great with my blue wrap dress, and my white linen trousers too.  They would probably look good with my pyjamas too, don't you think?

Accentuate the Positive.

I am watching a very touchy-feely documentary about positive thinking, I was lent the DVD by a faculty member who is teaching a course on life coaching.  I choose to watch it this evening because Doc is out with some friends, and I know that if we were watching this together he would be harrumphing at all the stuff about the power of positive visualisation.  I would find this annoying, because, honestly, I quite like it. 

Personally I prefer having happy thoughts to miserable ones, but that can be really difficult sometimes.  By which I mean that occasionally I do need to go onto anti-depressants, because in my experience they help my brain re-train to be nice to itself and sometimes it just needs to be reminded about that.  In the most basic terms, life is really so much better when my brain isn't trying to sabotage itself all the time with horrible and repetitive trains of thought!

I've mentioned before that when I started this blog I decided that it would have an upbeat tone at all times; so even if I have a bad day, I really try to find one thing about it that was funny, or interesting, or even find something else to write about, damn it!  Part of this decision was because I am writing this with my lovely Mum in mind, and I simply never want her to worry about me; but I also wanted to purposely make myself think positively every day, even if only for an hour or so, just to reinforce that habit.

I started trying this when I was at university towards the end of my second year, when I was really unhappy.  I was walking home after a lecture one day, allowing myself to wallow in whatever was bothering me at the time.  I honestly cannot remember what that was, but I do remember giving myself a little mental shake and making myself look around to really pay attention to where I was.  I had been about to just march past a really beautiful tree with blossom on it, so I stopped and made myself notice how the colours of the flowers looked against the blue.  It's such a clear memory, and it's simply of my noticing a sad thought in my head, then purposely working to change it to a good thought.

Anyway, it's an interesting film and I fully intend to visualise a whole bunch of lovely things from now on.  I think I shall start with a nice day tomorrow so I can wear a fun skirt.  Maybe with boots.

You've Got To Have A System.

My keys were rapidly getting out of control, I just seemed to have so many of them; at least two of which were unwieldy and rarely actually used.

So after much thought I have developed a three keyring system.  Stay with me here.

1. My house keys remain on my favourite sardine can keyring.
2. My car key moved onto the outsize rubber goldfish keyring.
3. My office keys go onto a quick release keyring, that is then attached to the goldfish keyring.

All three are then attached to the carabiner, along with the allen key which I need for the fire escape doors.

You see this way I can keep everything organised, but even better I can actually fit whichever keys I need at any one time into my pocket.

Which is very sensible.  And none of this has anything to do with the fact that the eyes of the rubber goldfish are bright blue LEDs, that flash whilst a litle speaker in the fishes tummy makes electronic underwater sounds.  Not to mention I love the flamboyant tail!  It makes me happy!

Goodbye "TV Stole My Baby".

I have deleted my other blog, which Doc gave the name "TV Stole My Baby" to, because I have only updated it twice since I set it up anyway.  Plus it was supposed to be a separate space for me to post TV reviews to, and I'm somewhat disenchanted by the fact that any new series I get excited by keep getting cancelled.

Well, that and I can't stop watching "Law and Order" marathons.  Now that I've got over my aversion to the terrible music (and what the hell is that ching-ching noise supposed to be anyway?) I like all three of it's incarnations and I am simply unable to turn off the back-to-back episodes once they gets started.  The point is though there is really is not a lot that you can say about "Law and Order", without having to plaster the thing in spoiler warnings.  Except from it's always entertaining, and the lead actors look like they are having the best time.  I love Vincent D'Onofrio, and his partnership with Kathryn Erbe has so much texture to it; Ooh, Ooh, and Olivia d'Abo is surprisingly good as an evil, um, librarian.

Anyway, "Law and Order" is good, but really does the world need a regularly updated blog full of posts like that last paragraph?  No, I didn't think so either.  Delete.

Oh! Nancy!

To re-cap, this morning I found that the litter tray had been turned over by Edith.  When the Doc got up and I told him this, he asked me how I definitely knew that it had been Edith who was responsible.

Elementary my dear (Doc) Watson:

1. Edith came to tell us about the catastrophe, that's what all the miaowing was about.
2. Nancy is just far too small and timid to tip over the box.
3. Finally, and this was what really counted against her, Edith's fur was covered with litter.

So we needed to put the lid on the tray, to stop Edith's gymnastics on the rim of the tray, but the problem was that Nancy has a phobia of climbing into small spaces.  This reaction is mainly to pet carriers, but I can see why she'd think the covered litter tray was the same thing.

When I got home this evening I put the lid on, and kept an eye on Nancy.  When she went into the bathroom I watched her (toilet training cats can feel very voyeuristic frankly, because you have to try to catch them at exactly the right moment), she stared at the covered tray and trotted straight back out.  I picked her up, carried her back and put her on top of the tray.  Then I made a big fuss of her until she started purring, before I gently guided her through the hole (Ok I pushed her, but very gently!), and naturally she jumped straight back out.  I did this twice more, and then I let her run off.

A couple of hours later I heard a scrabbling noise, and I could see Edith, so I knew it wasn't her.  It was sweet little Nancy, working through her phobias and maintaining her status as the good cat in the house.

Your move Edith.

(By the way if it worries you that I'm labelling one cat as good, and therefore, by default, the other cat is bad, I should point out that Edith gives not one toss. She knows we adore her, and so she behaves how ever she likes, bats her eyelashes and purrs.  She gets away with blue murder that cat!)

Oh. Edith.

I really should pay more attention when it's Edith who is raising hell in the mornings. She wasn't hungry, she was trying to tell me she had successfully tipped over the new litter tray and it made an extremely impressive mess.

Good Source of Fiber.

I never cease to be amazed about which foods I can find here and which I can't.

For example I have only been able to find one specialist place that sells blackcurrant jam, and nowhere at all that stocks rhubarb yogurt; but I can get Dorset Cereals.  I first bought this brand when I was leaving in Brighton, mainly because of the gorgeous packaging; but it turns out they actually make a very tasty muesli.

I am very excited about breakfast now.

Sneaky Snacks.

I'm just about to go out to the cinema, to see a film I suspect will be really, really, really bad. 

I cannot wait! 

It's been ages since I went to see a film I was anticipating being this awful.  Squeee!

Even better I have just enough time to make some sweet popcorn to sneak in with me, I might even go the whole hog and treat myself to a cup of tea in my lovely new tea tumbler.

A bad movie, with illicit snacks and a proper cup of tea?  Bliss!

Benefit Splurge.

Whilst we were in Philadelphia I decided to buy some waterproof mascara, because I get panda eyes by the end of the day if I'm using non-waterproof.

I went into Macy's, and tracked down the Benefit counter.  It was still pretty early on a Saturday morning, so the girls at the counter pounced on me and gave me a make-over.  This naturally resulted in my buying a couple of other things too; a brightening primer (it's a sort of light foundation, and it's smells delicious!) and a face powder with SPF 15.

 

Which isn't too extravagant really, is it?  Especially as I haven't bought any make-up since before our wedding, which is over two years ago now.  Actually that is a really long time to go between make-up splurges, I shall try to make sure that doesn't happen again!

Especially since on this particular occasion they were running a special offer on the powder, so when I bought that I also got a cosmetics bag. Yay!  I love Benefit's cosmetics bags!  They use great vintage mannequins in their marketing material, and they also feature on the bags which I really like.

Even better inside the bag was a selection of Benefit products, so I also got an eyeshadow, a minty blue lip-gloss, a highlighter, a blue mascara and a couple of concealer samples too.

I've been using all the different products since we got back, except for the eye shadow and the concealer, and I really like all of it!  In all honesty the idea of a blue mascara gave me scary 80s flashbacks at first, but it's actually a deep violet blue, so it darkens your lashes and makes the whites of your eyes pop.

And as for the waterproof mascara? It's great, I did my face before the event this morning and my eye make-up stayed where it was all day.  That's how it should be of course, but bear in mind I had a long nap this afternoon and it still hadn't budged.

Love it.

Saturday Job

Ugh. I can't believe I'm up & posting at this time on a Saturday.

I have to work an event this morning, which actually won't be too bad as I have press ganged some students into helping.

Actually the worst part has been deciding what to wear. I need to look smart, but it's a Saturday so I want to wear something fun. On top of that dilemma is the ever present weather conundrum. There is frost on the ground now, but we are expecting a high of 70 today. I mean really! Pick one and stick with it!

A Thoughtful Gift.

Doc actually had a fantastic day on Wednesday.  He should really have bought a lottery ticket.

I think he would almost certainly say that the highlight was one of his students coming to see him with a thank you card and a pack of McVities Digestives Caramels.  Apparently there is a English food shop in Charlotte, who knew?

Doc C is SO delighted, but he hasn't opened them yet.  He's waiting for the perfect cup of tea I think.

Good News / Bad News

Yay it's Friday!  We had my director's two poodles running around the office today!  I will be working an event tomorrow!

Oh wait, that last one isn't so great actually.  Huh.

And Friday should mean "Dollhouse" is on, but I have to wait whole week before the next episode, because a special encore of "Prison Break" is on.  Which means they are showing last season's finale again before the premiere of the new season.  Grrrrh.  On the other hand last night's episode of "CSI" was a Star Trek spoof which centered mainly around Hodges.  It was brilliant!

Also for dinner tonight, we will be having lobster cakes with peas and a seven grain pilaf from Kashi.  Yum!

And I forgot to put a belt on this morning, so I had to buy one at lunch because I had to keep hiking my jeans up.  When I got changed out of my work clothes this evening I was able to take my jeans off without undoing them.  Seriously.  I bought these jeans in January, and they are too big for me now.

So all in all, it's been a pretty good day!

Cats! Not The Musical!

I haven't taken any photos today, because it's been a ridiculously busy day.  However I have recently uploaded several pictures of the cats to my Facebook, including this one I took of Nancy napping a while ago.

Nancy is so cute when she does that!

In other, slightly less adorable, news we bought the cats a new litter tray on the way back from Philadelphia.  It's called the Clever Cat, and it's supposed to be instinctive for any cat to use it.  Which is good, because the written instructions on the side contradict the instruction sheet that came with it, which means I'm slightly confused, so I'm really glad that the cats can't read.

It's actually really simple, the sides of the tray are about 18 inches high, and there is a lid with a hole in it.  The idea being that the cats hop up onto the lid, jump down through the hole into the tray.  Then when they come back up, they walk across the lid and that acts like a door mat, getting the litter off their paws.  So far the cats have expressed a preference for the box without the lid, but it's still a lot better then the old tray.

Particularly because Edith finds poop absolutely shameful apparently, but she has yet to work out how to tip this one over.  So far.

After A Long Day At Work.

I was delighted to discover that we had:

• We had Gin in the cupboard! 
• Tonic in the fridge! 
• Ice in the freezer! 

Which means, of course, G&T for me!  Yay!

Portrait of the Crumpets.

These are the last two crumpets, toasted with butter and set honey.

I KNOW!!!

Doc promises me that he will be making more.

Fun with Names!

One of the excellent things about having a first name with three syllables is that it gives you some flexibility and over the course of my life time I have been known as:

1. Jen - The simplest form of my name, and my usual default setting in a social setting.
2. Jenny - My name for most of my childhood, and then I decided that I HATED being called that so then I insisted everyone call me Jen.
3. Jen-Pen - Thanks Mum!
4. Jenks - Thanks Mum!
5. Jenky-Jen - Thanks Mum!
6. Blonde Jen - My University nickname, because my BFF is also called Jen and she is a red-head.
7. Frank - There were three other Jens in one workplace, so I got the nickname Frank after a flamboyant 80's football star via a very tenuous bit of rhyming slang.
8. JC - You cannot beat the beautiful simplicity of initials, I shall not reveal what the C stands for though.
9. Jennifer - I like to use Jennifer at work, because it sounds so much more efficient doesn't it?
10. "Jennifer Middle-Name Last-Name" - Only used when my mother had to let me know in advance that I was in really big trouble).

A Word from Edith Cavell-Cat.

Hello.  My name is Edith Cavell-Cat.  I am Beautiful.

Last weekend our humans went away for 4 days, and this was unacceptable.  Fortunately the nice Jasmine came and fed us and played with us, she is very nice.  I do not know what we would have done were it not for her, frankly.

When our humans returned, the female had many exciting paper bags that she would not let me get into.  This strange object was in one of the bags.  She made it hot, placed it on the stool and then pointed the silver thing at it.  She must have forgotten that the silver thing is to be pointed only at me.  I sniffed the object to determine it's purpose, but it was not food, or a toy and it could not pay attention to me.  It is therefore, clearly, useless and of no interest.

The humans stayed at home this weekend, and this was acceptable.  I sat on both humans, and they gave me adequate amounts of attention.

(This is a 16 ounce tea tumbler.  I took other photos of it illustrating it's fabulousness, but these ones with Edith were funnier)

Doc C: The Thinking Woman's Crumpet.

When I moved to North Carolina in October 2007 I knew things would be different, and I was somewhat prepared for that; but whilst there are things you can acclimatise to and things that you can import, there are other things that it is very hard to accept are lost to you.

I speak of crumpets.

There are few things as cautiously flavourful, and with such a satisfying texture, as a good crumpet.  Piping hot, dripping with salty butter and accompanied by a good strong cup of tea they are simply delicious.  And impossible to get here.  Oh, I after some trial and error I discovered a half way decent English muffin, and you can easily get PG Tips, but crumpets still alluded me; so naturally crumpets were what I really really wanted.

Today Doc C has successfully made me crumpets. 

The Doc is such a sweet and modest man that all he asks by way of thanks was "big post props" which he later specified should also be "Poetic".  He also wishes that I convey to my Mother just how well her daughter is being cared for, even if she is several thousand miles away from a branch of M&S.  I'm sure you will agree this is only fair and proper.

I would post a picture of the deliciousness, but frankly my camera was upstairs and the hot crumpets, fresh from the griddle, were downstairs.  Would you really expect a woman who has not eaten crumpets in over eighteen months to postpone that reunion for the sake of documentary evidence?  Of course not!

Anyway, Doc made loads!  I'll take some photos tomorrow, after work when I'm enjoying a hot cup of tea and a plate of crumpets.  I think I may spread marmite on them, and then put some slices of good sharp cheddar on top and then grill (American translation: broil) them until the cheese is bubbly, and the marmite has sunk through the deliciously spongey layers.  I almost can't wait, maybe I'll just have that for dinner and go for a new household record in carb consumption in a single 24 hour period.

Yum.

The Red Peep-Toe DMs Are Mine!

Hoorah!  Amazon had the red Doc Marten Pansy peep-toe shoes!  The ones that I really liked, but that sold out from the DM website!  I just bought them! They will be on the way to me tomorrow!  Brilliant!

How to be an Accidental Domestic Goddess.

Today I cleaned our bathroom, and then decided I'd been cleaned enough for one day and came downstairs to watch cartoons.  Somehow whilst I was trying to veg out, as is appropriate for a long weekend, I started moving the furniture, re-organising the bookcase, clearing the coffee table and sorting out all the random bits of paper that had accumulated.  Then I went upstairs to get our bedding to wash.

The only thing I didn't do was vacuum, and only because I asked Doc C to do that (Obviously the house needs to be cleaned occasionally, but I don't really see why that is entirely my responsibility).  I'd already done the downstairs bathroom yesterday when I took the old litter tray out, so all I have to do know is the kitchen.

I would feel very domesticated, where it not for Doc whipping up a batch of chocolate cookies as I type this entry.

The Picture of the Portrait of Dorian Gray.

I was intending to post a picture of Dorian Gray and his portrait last night, but by the time I was fairly happy with both of them it was half twelve.  So I thought I may as well wait until I had some actual sunlight to get the shot.

As you can see I decided to depict the very early part of the story, so the portrait is still in the preliminary sketch phase.  I'm no Basil Haywood with oil paints, so the finished portrait wasn't really an option.  Although Jonny did offer to stitch a portrait for me, which I think would have been amazing!  Next time we are on the same continent m'Dear, we really must collaborate on something fun!

I hope Jill likes him.  Happy Birthday!

(By the way, if you have never read "The Picture of Dorian Gray" it's a great story, and it's only thirteen chapters long.  It's on Project Guggenheim, so it's free to download if you are in the States; however if you are outside the US copyright laws may prohibit you from downloading it from P.G. for free.  These thing vary.

My favourite film version is the 1945 classic starring Hurd Hatfield, George Sanders, and Angela Lansbury, but there have been several different interpretations some of which look ghastly.  I am very interested in the production being released later this year with Ben Barnes (you know, Prince Caspian), Colin Firth and Ben Chaplin.)

Hot Cross Buns (Minus the Cross)

Happy Easter! 

Doc C has put together the dough for a batch of Hot Cross Buns, although we did just have a slight disagreement over whether it was entirely necessary to put the crosses on.  I think you know where I stood on the matter.  With or without crosses, I am really looking forward to eating them straight out of the oven.

Being an atheist, to me Easter has usually meant chocolate overload, but without the giving something up for Lent part.  This year I'm trying to lose some weight, and so, whilst I haven't exactly been dieting, I have been keeping track of what I eat using a calorie counting application on the iTouch.  This means I have to do a fair bit of counting and measuring of portions, but that's not difficult and I'm not eating vastly different foods, so I'm still a happy bunny.  For example I've had one small packet of Cadbury's Mini Eggs this year, as opposed to buying the big packets as part of a two-for-one deal in Sainsbury's, and then feeling like I've been good because I saved some money.  In a similar way when I buy lunch at the lovely bakery across the road from my office, I feel obligated to buy one of the lunch deals, which is a slice of foccacia, a drink and a cookie, because adding the cookie mysteriously lowers the price considerably.  Now I usually buy an oatmeal and raisin cookie for Doc C to have, although if I feel like eating a cookie myself that's absolutely fine too, but I don't want to eat the cookie just because it's there.  I want to eat food that I actually really want to eat, not eat food because it happens to be available, and that one small change in approach has really made a lot of difference to my eating habits.

Actually it occurred to me this morning that, since January, I have lost the equivalent of Edith and Nancy in weight.  Isn't that a weird thought?  I was basically carrying Nancy on my bum and thighs, with Edith around my waist and tummy.  All the time.  I feel tired just thinking about it.

I've still got ten pounds to go before I hit my target weight, so that'll be the equivalent of losing a third medium-sized cat.  You know I'm beginning to consider starting a weight loss program that uses cats as units of measurement, I just feel like thinking of the pounds in those terms is very motivating for some reason.

Duck Earphones.

I did some very satisfying shopping whilst in Philly, as I believe I may have mentioned already.  One of the things I bought was a set of duck earphones.

I would be prepared to bet that right now you are looking at the screen and wondering what a grown woman could possibly want with duck earphones.  I'm sure that you will agree that these are far more sensible than my two other choices, which were a horribly realistic pair of flies or a Barbie pink pig (Left ear head and front legs, right ear tail and back legs).

Really I just wanted some cheap earphones for the gym, so that I don't wreck my good earphones, and these were only $11.

Plus, Hello!  Ducks!

The Crochet of Dorian Gray.

I've nearly finished another amigurumi, and I have spent pretty much all day working on that.  All I have to do tomorrow is the face, which I'm not going to start this evening because I'm tired and I'll just mess it up if I try now.

This is a birthday present for my friend Jill, she asked me to make her something when she saw Yoda.  I asked what she would like, and her first suggestion was Jane Eyre, but we couldn't think of how to make her interesting because the whole point is that Jane is supposed to be mousy and unremarkable; which is, of course, why she was played by the famously plain Joan Fontaine in the forties adaptation.

Jill's next suggestion was Dorian Gray, which I thought was a fantastic idea.  I could see how I would make Dorian, but I had no idea how to do the portrait, but then we went to Philadelphia and the answer to that question dropped into my shopping basket.  I haven't started that bit yet, so I'll let you see it when it's finished.

The cats have been very helpful with this project.  Nancy pounced on the yarn, and gave the crochet needle a good chew to make sure it was thoroughly inanimate.  On the other hand, Edith padded all over my shoulders and even gave me a head massage, although personally I could have done with fewer claws and perhaps less biting (that sounds like she was attacking my head, but she was just being really over affectionate today; so I think this was her deranged attempt to act like a human and fuss me with her paws, then she gave up and started grooming me instead).

My plan is to make one more amigurumi for the Doc, and then I'll be running another contest!  This is going to be slightly different to the last one, and I think it will be really fun.

The Difference Between Reality and Imagination.

I didn't go to this exhibition, but I really liked the banner for it.

Of course I mainly didn't go because I would only have been disappointed if the jellybean children weren't skipping around in a circle to the beautiful sound of the butterflies singing.

My Plans for a Long Weekend at Home.

This being Easter weekend I have four days off (although I was told it isn't called Easter Weekend officially because the "separation of church and state" means it cannot be referred to that.  Later in the day I saw news footage reporting with horror that President Obama has not been to church since being in office.) and naturally because it's a public holiday the weather is predicted to be awful. 

That's ok though, because none of my intended activities for the weekend require fine weather.  So far I have planned an intensive program of:

• reading,
• crocheting,
• catching up on TV,
• making a fuss of the cats,
• playing video games. 

These tasks will be broken up by some serious napping, and I shall also be requiring Doc C to dig out the recipe for hot cross buns, so that I can snack appropriately.  But in the meantime, I think I need to go to bed and watch "Numb3rs" before having a good night's sleep. 

I've already turned my alarm off.

Was Philadelphia's Gravity Different in the Late 1700's?

I am a big fan of Picnik, today I thought I'd see what treasures the fancy collage package has and I found the perfect backdrop for my photos of The Signer.

This statue commemorates the signing of both the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution of the United States, but it is not of one specific person.  Bearing that in mind, and with all due respect to those makers of history, I would love to know how the man depicted here is intending to sign the thing?  For one thing he's going to get ink all over his sleeve if he is not careful.

Which Weather When?

Yesterday: It snowed quite a lot.
Today: We had a high of sixty degrees Fahrenheit (That's 15.5 degrees Celsius) .

Yesterday: I needed to wear my pea coat and leg warmers
Today: I didn't bother putting my raincoat on.

Tomorrow?  Big thunderstorm!

Mountain weather keeps you guessing.

The Look of Love (the Dusty version, or the ABC - They're Both Cracking Tunes)

The name Philadelphia is derived from the Greek and means Brotherly Love (Look Mum!  I used "..derived from the Greek" in a sentence! My Classical Civilisations GCSE and A-Level have finally paid off!).

This is a very well known sculpture in the city, and when I walked past there were several dozen tourists posing under it.  In fact I had to crop the damn people out, because they spoiled my shot frankly.

And isn't it ironic?  Don't you think?

Comedy Central: Can I Have a Quick Word?

For crying out loud, Comedy Central!  Would you PLEASE stop running that atrocious trailer for "Krod Mandoon and the Flaming Sword of Fire".

Look, I am of the generation that enjoyed Sean Maguire's work as Tegs in "Grange Hill" and he didn't do the worst Irish accent I've ever heard during his time as Aidan in "Eastenders", but I still think this looks awful.

To be honest I would probably have watched it, just because I usually enjoy geeky comedy and this actually does have a half-way decent cast; however I really have seen that trailer one too many times now and I am pretty sure that it's going to have some truly appalling jokes in it.  I also think special mention must go to the crassly overt sexualisation of the central female lead, and a side kick who I am prepared to bet quite a lot of money will turn out to be the "hilariously" flamboyant gay character.  Why not just call this "Porky's: The D&D Years!" and be done with it?

In summary, Comedy Central, this saturation advertising campaign has been complete over kill.  By which I mean that you have effectively killed any faint flicker of interest I had in seeing this, despite it starring several British actors that I am usually fond of.  That is really quite an achievement.

The Gay Rights History of Philadelphia.

On our way to get our breakfast Dunkin' Donuts on the last morning in Philadelphia, we noticed a historical marker which marked the Gay Rights demonstrations that took place in Philadelphia in the 1960s.

Naturally I had to take several photos, and this shot with the blue sky and the lens flare from the sun is my favourite.

This may well be the best historical marker I've ever seen.

Why We Drove Home in Complete Silence.

I ate at my desk today and skipped lunch, just so that we could leave early today, and I called Doc C to let him know that we could leave straight after his last class.

He didn't turn up after his class, so I called his mobile and left a message.  Then I walked over to his office, waited there for about fifteen minutes and left another message.  Then I got really annoyed, so I went to find the car, sat there fuming and called him again.

At 5:30, the time I usually leave work, my phone rang.

He'd been playing pool.

I'd been waiting for 45 minutes, so I was really quite cross with him by this point.  Particularly because I could just tell he wasn't been listening when I told him I was skipping lunch, and even though he'd had his phone in his pocket it really isn't very much use when it's on silent.  Grrrh!

He's made me a cup of tea now, and apologised sufficiently so he's forgiven.  I s'pose.